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| November 25, 2008 |
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In the "Psychology of Human Misjudgment," Charlie Munger, Warren Buffet’s long-time business partner, assembled a list of 25 psychology-based tendencies that, while often useful, often mislead.
Number 13 - Overoptimism Tendency. Demosthenes, the most famous Greek orator, said, "What a man wishes, that also will he believe." How else do you explain our love of gambling and investing? Antidote: simple probability math that we all learned in high school.
Number 14 - Deprival-Superreaction Tendency. Munger describes two types of tendencies here. First, the fact that humans generally feel the pain of a loss much more than the thrill of a gain. Second, if we are very close to gaining something we greatly want, but lose it at the last moment, we react as if we had owned the gain and it was stolen from us. So, in displaying this tendency, we often compare what is near instead of what really matters. For instance, the guy with $10 million in his brokerage account who is highly irritated when he accidentally loses $100 of the $300 in cash he’s carrying around. See, we ordinarily react with such an irrational intensity to even a small loss, or threatened loss, of property, love, friendship, dominated territory, opportunity, status, or any other valued thing. Munger notes that, given that bureaucracies are perfect breeding grounds for these kinds of reactions, one of Jack Welch’s wisest actions at GE was fighting to eliminate bureaucracy.
Munger cites a number of different, and very interesting, examples and variations of this tendency. One is how it operates, in combination with the Inconsistency-Avoidance Tendency (No. 5), as between ideological believers and non-believers. The believers are highly threatened, sensing a possible loss of safety and security in their beliefs and the status quo. Great agitation, and often violence, results. Possible antidote to the ideological group thinkers: never let them get too comfortable; always make sure there are able and articulate non-believers who are accepted by the leader as critical team members. Another idea: insist on a culture of courtesy, much like the U.S. Supreme Court.
Number 15 - Social Proof Tendency. The tendency to think and act as we see others around us acting and thinking. And leaders are often the prime examples of this tendency at work. Witness the Internet bubble of the late 1990s and very early 2000s. We see another leader, or several leaders, doing something, and we doubt our current position and wonder if that other leader or those other leaders know something we don’t. This tendency is intensified by stress or puzzlement. It’s why cults target people who are out of sorts, feeling lost. By the way, this tendency is just as potent when it comes to omission as commission. We are often lulled into inaction by the inaction of others, when we know in our hearts we should be acting.
From Poor Charlie’s Almanack (2005), a compilation of the wit and wisdom of Charles T. Munger.
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| November 19, 2008 |
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Interestingly, at least with the verbal voice, listening to ourselves is one of the most neglected practices in communication. With the written voice, we usually listen to ourselves by editing what we write before we communicate our message. With our verbal voice, few of us rehearse and once it has been expressed, we usually don’t pay close attention to exactly how it sounded. Interestingly, most people I know who listen to recordings of themselves are unhappy with the way they sound.
I have found it highly beneficial to record myself in practice communications. If I have an important telephone call to make, meeting to attend, or speech to deliver, I’ll do more than just jot an outline of what I’d like to convey. I’ll record my comments on a little digital recorder (I like the Olympus ones) ahead of time and then listen carefully for ways that I can improve. Alternatively, I’ll rehearse what I want to say in front of someone whom I can trust for candid constructive criticism. |
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| November 14, 2008 |
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In “venting” communications, you “air out” your emotions. You might be angry, for instance, and need to express your anger to another person to relieve the tension inside of you.
Unlike socializing, a lot more strategy could be used here. In my experience, most people vent too frequently and with too little forethought. They then come across as negative people and often alienate more positive-minded people with whom they interact.
I suggest four rules for venting:
1. Remember the old maxim of questionable origination, “Never attribute to malice what can be adequately explained by ignorance or stupidity.” Our fears tend to take us immediately to the place of believing that someone has a mission to damage us. In reality, that is rarely the case. People just don’t have time to intentionally wreck our lives. But we ascribe the worst to the other and then react with the malice we have perceived on his or her part.
2. Let some time pass. By definition, venting is reacting, but you likely want to reduce the amount of venom in the reaction and time usually helps greatly. The amount of time varies, but it must be enough so that the next rule can be satisfied.
3. Express what you feel and only what you feel—not how wrong someone is or what a jerk someone is. A person who was neglected at an important company meeting might be initially inclined to react with the following comment to his friend, “Joe, my manager, is an &#*@!&!!!! He’s as bad as they come. What a jerk! I wish they’d fire his &#*!!!” A much healthier reaction would be, “I feel angry that Joe did not ask my opinion at the meeting. I feel hurt. I am afraid that he may not think highly enough of my opinion to ask me them in front of a group of people. That makes me sad and I am afraid that I may not have a future with this company as long as Joe is my manager.”
4. After expressing your emotions, focus the communication on the positive things you can do to improve the situation. The neglected employee might say to his friend, “I am thinking about asking Joe to grab a cup of coffee with me and expressing how I feel. What would you suggest?” |
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| November 10, 2008 |
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In a "socializing" communication, where you are just communicating for enjoyment or to build a relationship, there usually is not a lot of strategy needed. The purpose being social, the strategy is generally to have fun, communicate love, or share experiences, thoughts, and emotions. I have found it is useful, however, to examine my social interactions for ways I can improve them.
Next time: “venting” communications. |
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| November 6, 2008 |
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In a "learning communication," where you are trying to extract information from the other, there are two primary considerations that affect strategy: the quantity of information you need or want, and the time and other needs of the other.
If the amount of information is large, you might use open-ended questions, allow the other to deliver the information as he or she sees best, and fill in the voids with more specific questions later. If the information is small, you might be very direct and specific.
You’ll want to respect the time needs of the other. Look for signals from him or her, and consider asking directly, about the time he or she has available for you and make adjustments accordingly. What about his or her other needs? Do your best to anticipate possible fears and make his or her communication with you as safe as a possible. If the other needs confidentiality, then commit to it if you are able and honor it without exception, or explain why you cannot commit to it.
Above and beyond the time needs and fears of the other, consider the exchange needed by the other. If you consider that nothing in life is a one-way flow, then you must consider what the person producing the information needs in exchange. Given that this is usually an implied need, intuition is critical in identifying it. Perhaps the other needs the feeling that you will offer information he or she needs back to him or her at some point in the future. Perhaps he or she needs your gratitude. Perhaps he or she needs your respect or approval.
Next time: “socializing” communications. |
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| November 3, 2008 |
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In the "Psychology of Human Misjudgment," Charlie Munger, Warren Buffet’s long-time business partner, assembled a list of 25 psychology-based tendencies that, while often useful, often mislead.
Number 10 - Influence-from-Mere-Association Tendency. You know this one. The one that makes beer producers put beautiful women in their television ads. More insidiously, the one that makes makers of some products charge a high price, knowing that many consumers associate that with quality. This one is at work constantly, often working on the sub- and even unconscious level. Another take on this is "to assume is to make an "ass" out of "u" and "me"."
Munger talks about one bad effect of this tendency, what he calls the "Persian Messenger Syndrome." Ancient Persians would kill the messenger of bad news. Today, it’s what makes some lawyers keep toiling away on a bad case, rather than tell their client what they know in their heart. It’s what makes subordinates shy away from telling leaders what is really happening in the market or in their shop. Antidote: build a culture, as Warren Buffet has done at Berkshire, of welcoming bad news, even before the good news.
Number 11 - Simple, Pain-Avoiding Psychological Denial Tendency. The reality is too painful to bear, so distort the facts until they become bearable. I worked with the board of a company once that did this for several years with respect to the extremely poor performance of its CEO, only because the pain of having to replace him seemed too great to bear.
Number 12 - Excessive Self-Regard Tendency. We all know this one. The one that leads ninety percent of Swedish drivers to rate themselves as above average. It also applies to one’s major relationships and possessions. We tend to over-appraise our spouses, children, cars, homes, you-name-it. And then we tend to prefer people who are most like ourselves. (Think about the negative effect of this in the hiring process.) And we tend to like our decisions a lot after we have made them, often more than is objectively justified.
Antidote: force yourself to be more objective when thinking about yourself, your family and friends, your property, and the value of your future and past activity. It’s not easy, but will serve you better than simply letting this natural tendency take its course. (Chapter One of my book, The Source of Leadership, deals with employing presence as a means of achieving, among other things, higher conscious awareness.)
From Poor Charlie’s Almanack (2005), a compilation of the wit and wisdom of Charles T. Munger.
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